


A Deeper Love You'll Never Find

by Cali_se



Series: Deep [9]
Category: Breaking Bad
Genre: Canon Divergence, Falling In Love, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-09
Updated: 2018-03-09
Packaged: 2019-03-29 02:33:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13917531
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cali_se/pseuds/Cali_se
Summary: Leaving Las Vegas, what's next for Walt and Jesse?





	A Deeper Love You'll Never Find

**Author's Note:**

> So, here is part 9, the final part, of the Deep series, which started out as a stand alone ficlet and grew into something more. I've loved every minute of writing it. Thank you for reading along, and for all the lovely feedback. And a thank you hug to my beta, Melanieathene, for her encouragement and help.

Being totally honest with himself, Walt has to admit that he hadn't expected Jesse to make any money in Vegas, let alone big money. After that first day, and his own rather impressive win, he'd gained confidence in his ability to work the room and had envisaged himself, with Jesse as his lucky charm, taking the casino by storm and bringing down the house. Maybe he would have, if that stupid stomach upset hadn't intervened. 

Jesse himself is as shocked as Walt by the turn of events and only really begins to calm down when Walt eventually gets him back to their room and away from the buzz and chaos of the casino. With the door shut behind them, they hug each other tight and allow themselves a few cries of jubilation.

"I leave you alone for one day, Jesse!" Walt says. "One day!" 

"Oh, man... I can't believe it. I was gonna walk away... I--I just decided to keep going... And then that thing just went crazy." 

"I know! You said."

"Sorry, am I repeating myself?" Jesse falls backwards on the bed. "Fuck!"

Walt joins him, smoothing his hair, caressing his cheeks with gentle fingertips. "Are you okay, Sweetheart?"

"Ahh, I'm buzzin', yo. Totally psyched! We have enough money now! For you to give some to your kids. For us. More than enough, right?"

"Yes."

"So... How do we do this? I mean, how much do you wanna give them?"

"We'll work it all out, Jesse. Properly. Make plans. For now... Let's just enjoy the moment. Just us, huh?"

"Did you get everything that guy down there said? Because... my mind was totally fucked by then."

"Yes. Don't worry, I'll take care of everything."

Jesse takes Walt's hand in his. "We can go anywhere now, live anywhere. Can't we? We can get away from... it all."

"Yes, Jesse. We can. Now let's eat, shall we? Do you want to go out? Or shall I call room service?" 

"Can we eat in here?"

"Sure. Maybe we can ask them to send up some champagne?"

"Yeah! Hey, let's run a bath and drink it in there."

"Sounds good to me!"

***

Their bath feels like a welcome cocoon; they've filled it with bubbles that smell like a pine forest and fresh mountain air. Walt cradles Jesse between his legs as they sip their champagne, his free arm around Jesse's waist. 

"Do you remember that jacuzzi bath? In the kickass hotel you took me to?" Jesse asks.

"Yes, of course I remember."

"I asked what were we going to do now and you said we had the room for another hour, or something..."

"Yes."

"Did you know?"

"Know what?"

"That I already loved you."

Walt takes a breath. He places their glasses on the corner shelf of the bath, then Jesse leans back against him. Walt places delicate kisses against his hair, wrapping both arms around him, crossing them over his chest to pull him in. It feels as if he's trying to merge their bodies together, that he can't get close enough.

"We got more than an hour, didn't we?" Jesse says.

"Yes, Jesse, we did. Thank god." 

They lie together in the warm suds until their fingers crinkle, then wrap towels around their waists and move to the bed where they lie down together. It's not long before their towels are discarded.

Walt smiles, running his hand over Jesse's chest. "I have to say, I'm not mad about tattoos," he says. "But I love yours." He traces his fingers over the ink on Jesse's skin. "They represent so much to me now." 

"Like what?"

"Desire... Anticipation... Pleasure... Hope." 

Jesse smiles, his eyes fixed on Walt. 

"Ohhh.... What you do to me, Jesse."

"D'you want me to stop doing it?"

"God, no. Never."

"I made your life more complicated, though, didn't I?"

"I managed that just fine myself."

"I really fucking love you." 

Walt feels his heart squeeze. He cups Jesse's face between his palms. "Kiss me, Jesse." 

Their kiss starts slowly, building moment by moment into something deeper; soon their passion takes over and they're moving against each other, seeking more. Walt can feel the light spring of Jesse's arousal nudging him as he kisses him again, and he cups it, encouraging it to grow. He feels it push against his palm as he sips at his lover's mouth, flicking his tongue teasingly between Jesse's lips and out again.

Jesse rolls over so that he's on top of Walt, and takes him in hand. Walt looks at Jesse the whole time: watches his eyes, loving the way he focuses entirely on making him feel good. And, oh, Jesse's touch _does_ feel good as he makes quick work of bringing Walt to orgasm. Walt moans Jesse's name as he climaxes, holding Jesse's free hand against his lips. It doesn't take long for Jesse to come, a few quick strokes and he's there, his eyes never once moving from Walt's gaze.

They fall asleep wrapped up in each other's arms, while a small lamp softly illuminates the room. 

Walt wakes up in the early hours. Unable to get back to sleep, he gets up and pours himself a drink. Sitting in the chair by the window, he watches Jesse sleeping in the low light. He still can't quite believe they're really doing this. They have a hard road to travel now, no doubt about it. The money is just the start. Walt knows he will be labelled all manner of terrible things by Skyler, Marie and Hank. He hasn't even considered the conversation he'll have telling his mother. _Hey Mom, listen. I'm running away with my ex student, he's in his twenties and oh, he's really cute. A little complex, but cute! What does he do? Well, heh! Funny story, he was a meth dealer. We've been making meth and distributing it together, actually. No, really, Mom, you'd like him._ Walt allows himself a small chuckle as he swigs back his brandy. _And the sex is mind blowing, which is always a plus._ He puts down his glass, wipes his mouth dry with the swipe of his hand. "And I love him with all my heart," he says aloud. He takes a deep breath and sighs it out. "I really, really do."

***

The lake looks so serene in the warmth of the day, as a cooling breeze shakes the tall, skinny poplars beyond, causing them to shimmer in the sun.  


Several months have passed since they went to Vegas, and Walt still can't quite believe he's here. It's a good place to be, among the poplars, living in their beautiful log cabin by the lake; it's a good place to spend a life and a good place to end one - when that time comes, sooner or later. He hopes with all his heart and soul it's the latter. He's doing okay at the moment, and that's all he needs to know.

They're loving the outdoors, being enveloped in greenery and all the shades of the changing seasons; chopping logs and cooking simple, homely food. Jesse's started painting and wood carving. He's not quite ready to quit cigarettes yet, but everything else is history. They bought a new car, and they moor a small boat at the lake, but that's it for expensive material goods. Now and then they take holidays in ritzy places, with special treats like taking long jacuzzi baths and making love on black silk sheets. But really, for Walt, every day feels like a treat. Waking up with Jesse in his arms, those big blue eyes being the first thing he sees each and every day, is a jewel too precious for words. He's still not sure what he did to deserve it.

He watches as the fish bob up to the surface and blow bubbles, and makes a mental note to get a fishing licence. He and Jesse could spend hours out here together.

As if on cue, a hand squeezes his shoulder. He looks up to find Jesse squinting down at him. He reaches up and takes his hand.

"So, what d'you wanna do?" Jesse asks as he sits down beside Walt.

"Anything." Walt smiles. "To be quite honest, I could just sit here all afternoon."

Jesse nods as he takes in their view. "It's beautiful. Aren't we lucky?" He glances at Walt and Walt knows what's coming. "Did you get a call?"

"Yeah."

"Was it okay?"

"Yes." Walt nods. "Yes, it was. Junior wants to see me, to talk. It's a start."

Jesse puts his arm around Walt and kisses his cheek. "That's awesome." 

"Well... we'll see. I'm... cautiously optimistic."

"D'you think you'll get to see Holly soon?"

"Oh, yes. I most definitely will."

"Well, one day they're both gonna be rich kids, huh?"

"Yes. That's true."

"Do you wanna go out and get some dinner soon?"

Walt nods. "Yes. That sounds good."

"And then I'm taking you to bed."

Walt meets Jesse's gaze and returns his smile. "Yes, you are."

Jesse gets up and holds out his hand; Walt takes it and gets to his feet. As Jesse turns to go back to the house, Walt stops him.

"Jesse, wait."

"Huh?"

"I've been thinking."

"Yeah? About what?"

"Us."

"Us?"

"Yes." Walt can sense the unease in Jesse as he waits for him to continue. "Remember that beautiful time we spent at the canyon? You asked me if I was going to propose. It was said in jest, but I knew somewhere deep inside, it wasn't really a joke. And I’m sorry I couldn’t ask you--"

"It's okay--"

Walt waves his hand. "Let me finish, Jesse. I couldn't ask you. Not then. I was still married to Skyler and it felt... it was all way too soon. Besides, I was worried she wouldn't grant me a divorce. Well, turned out she asked for one first."

"I know."

"So... Now things are... moving on, shall we say, how about we..."

Walt turns his eyes on the lake; his peripheral vision picks up Jesse, anxiously shuffling his feet, kicking against the ground, waiting. Walt turns back to him and takes both hands in his.

"Jesse... would you marry me?"

Jesse looks up into the trees, then lets his gaze settle on the water. When he looks back at Walt, his tear-filled eyes already say so much. When at last he nods in reply, Walt lets out a sigh of relief, and his heart seems to start beating again.

"Oh god! Jesse, are you sure?"

"Totally. You really wanna marry me?"

"Yes! And I thought we could go back to the canyon for a sort of honeymoon too, watch a few sunsets. Maybe this time we'll catch a sunri--"

Walt's words are taken from him as Jesse's lips cover his. As they pull away, Jesse grins at Walt through his tears. 

"Walt and Jesse Pinkman-White."

"Er... well..."

"C'mon, it does sound way better than White-Pinkman."

Walt laughs. "Okay, okay. I guess you're right."

"Yeah?"

"Yes, Jesse. You win."

They laugh as Walt pulls Jesse into an embrace. Then they stand together by the lakeside, holding one another tight, watching the sunshine throw sparkles on the water under an endless, clear blue sky. 

Home at last.


End file.
